When I was twelve I went to sleepover parties at my best friend Lisa's house almost every weekend. I spent all my time hanging out with Brigid, Martina, Deborah, Lisa, and Connie.

They all went to Catholic high schools. Except Deborah, she went to Oceanside High. I tried to keep in touch with them all. For ninth grade I succeeded. I even became really good friends with Stephanie, who I hadn't seen since she moved in 2nd or 3rd grade. But then I started dating Ron.

Ron was a sweet guy. I treated him like shit because he worshiped comics and video games and was almost impossible to get out of his house for anything other than those two things. I was cool with never doing anything at first, but after two months of it I got bored. He never had any money to go to movies, and I did. I had no problem paying for him, or even just for myself. He did. He never wanted to go to movies unless he paid. It would have been old-fashioned and gentlemanly if he ever had any money with which to take me out. But I spent a grand portion of my time hanging around with him. At least for a while.

Lisa threw a party near the end of my freshman year. She invited the whole old gang, a few new Sacred Heart friends, and Ron. Stephanie offered Ron and I a ride.

Then the fun began.

Stephanie didn't tell her grandmother Ron was invited. She also told her grandmother it was a sleepover. She didn't mention that Ron was getting a ride home at 11. Her grandmother was very upset that there were going to be boys at the party; She felt we were too young to have parties with boys. So Stephanie became sullen and angry and didn't say anything until we were at Lisa's house.

In Lisa's living room she began to bawl me out about how I should never have done this to her. I was just as straightforward and bullheaded as I am now so I pointed out she had offered the ride, and was standing next to me when Lisa invited Ron. I, unfortunately, was less tactful back then. "..so it's not MY fault you didn't tell your grandma! Why don't you just get over it already!"

Long story made short, they had invited Ron in the hopes I wouldn't bring him. That's dumb, even for high school. They felt I spent too much time with him, and they wanted me to spend more time with them. I was fine with spending more time with them, without Ron. But they never said anything. He went home about 10 and the rest of the party was without incident.

The very next day I'm at my house with Ron and my friend Cynthia when I get a call from Stephanie. She got grounded because she mouthed off to her mother, because her mother wanted to know why a boy was at a sleepover. Instead of just saying "I forgot to tell grandma and he went home at 10" she says "It's not my fault, Kathy wouldn't come to the party without him and I'm NOT going to get yelled at by you because Kathy's a bitch." I've never been grounded in my life and I think that would have gotten ME grounded.

But she blamed me. And she was really mad. She gave me an ultimatum.

I don't take well to ultimatums. Never have. I said "Okay. Goodbye." and I hung up. She, of course, called back with a How-dare-you-not-deal-with-my-shit attitude. "If you hang up on me don't ever expect another call from me again".

I explained to her, in very colorful language, that I didn't expect this call and hung up again. She called several more times. Then Lisa started calling, and Deborah. All claiming I had wronged them terribly. One after another then asked me to choose, and I chose the one who wasn't asking me to. Ron. He was very comforting through all of it. By the time I stopped getting phone calls, I was so angry I almost broke the phone.

Ron and I had a huge fight a few months later. We had gone to a dance and he refused to dance with me. I gave him a verbal lashing and let out all the anger and frustration of the past months of boring video games and walks to the comic store. He dumped me the next day because he couldn't trust me. I had lied to him about liking Street Fighter.

I've since seen all of these people. Brigid and Cynthia are the only ones I've never fought with. We get together from time to time and catch up. Brigid's mother died over the summer and I saw them both at the funeral. Cynthia and I planned to take Brigid out a few weeks afterwards but work and classes never allowed it. I hear about Ron from time to time and it seems he's doing well. Still going to Nassau, still in a band, and those kind of things. I ran into Stephanie and Lisa at the Witches's Brew coffee house also over the summer. We chatted pleasantly about nothing.

I don't hate them, but I don't see they've changed. Brian and I went out with them to dinner and a movie. We planned to go to a 9:45 showing but the theatre times were wrong. The movie was at 10:45. We all went anyway without complaints from anyone. About an hour in, Stephanie says she has to be home by midnight. She has a curfew and had to leave NOW to be home in time. We came in separate cars so I said "Okay...call me tomorrow." But she wouldn't go without us. And we weren't going to get up an hour into a movie and walk out. She hadn't said anything about a curfew at the start of the movie, and we weren't about to miss the end. So we finished watching the movie.

The next day I get a call that she got grounded. I didn't much care to listen to the rest. I gave her the gosh-that's-a-shame voice and said I had to go. We made plans to play pool later on in the week. She never called that night and when I called her she was 'out'. Brian and I called some other people and played pool with them. I haven't heard from Stephanie or Lisa since.

Gosh, that's a shame.